It's been a little fraught...again. We received an email to say that the extractor fan was due for delivery, so we got slightly excited. No delivery came so we went to Nantes for more kitchen research and left my son at home with instructions to investigate if the dogs detected any deliveries, (they can tell you if a flea breathes three fields away!) He sent us a message to say that he had checked the postbox to find a slip to say they tried to deliver the parcel the day before. No problem eh? Just arrange it to be redelivered and get on with it, yes? But we were all in the house when the delivery was supposed to have been attempted! I bite my lip and try to arrange redelivery. All is going well until it asks me for my 'portable', or mobile number. I put in my English mobile, the computer says 'non'. I add the English code, it says 'non'. I try to fudge it, it says 'non'. Oh, a pattern is emerging... I can't proceed and it's too early for wine. My lovely friend Janet rescues me as she gives me her French mobile number which the site accepts. Happy-ish days. I wonder if in future we need to take it in turns patrolling the road when a delivery is due? Whilst on the subject of deliveries I should mention the dog food. We buy our Weimaraners Orijen food which they thrive on. It's produced in Canada, sent to the distributer, Zooplus, in Germany and then sent to us. For some reason they have changed carrier and DHL are delivering instead, according to the email. What should have arrived on Tuesday is still not here. My boys are living off tuna and rice, not exactly a hardship for them and I am looking out constantly for the delivery. We take the boys for their usual 5km yomp and I tell my mum to listen out for a delivery. By the time we get back and the post box is checked there is another little slip, this time from'La Poste'...what happened to DHL? So another delivery has been missed. When I say missed what I mean is that the van has driven past, beeped once and then, because no one beamed into the road 'Star Trek' style, they have left. I quickly check to make sure I have enough wine to get me through. It's clearly not enough.... In the midst of all this I decided that the best thing to do would be to give any delivery person directions in case they actually decided to venture onto the property. I should point out that my mum lives in the old stables, we live in the barn and the old farmhouse, which is nearest the road, is rented out to holiday makers. I make out five notices and plaster the windows of the farmhouse and the post box. And then, miracle of miracles! One of the five deliveries due today has arrived. We are in receipt of a rather snazzy extractor fan! It's just a shame it will probably be the last thing to be fitted..... I haven't ordered the kitchen yet!